Embracing Vulnerability and Finding Hope
Resilience: Never. Give. Up. - Fall down 7 times; Get up 8! Japanese Proverb
I used to hate being called resilient. I felt that didn’t afford me the opportunity to be vulnerable. I was always expected to handle tough situations without showing weakness or needing help. When people are seen as resilient, it can lead others to dismiss their pain or hardship, thinking they "don’t need help" or "they can handle it." In reality, they might be going through a lot behind the scenes.
For some, always being the person who bounces back quickly can be emotionally exhausting. It's not just about bouncing back from challenges, but often it feels like you're expected to do it constantly—without a break or the space to process and heal.
Some individuals might feel they’re only surviving, not truly thriving, and being labeled resilient can make them feel like their coping mechanisms are being confused with actual strength. They may want acknowledgment of the toll it’s taken on them, rather than being reduced to a simple label.
Now, don’t get me wrong - I am very proud of all that I have accomplished despite my struggles (many of which were self-made). Without having gone through the trials, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. I can honestly say, I wouldn’t change a thing.
My experiences have led me to a small ranch in Canton, TX, with 5 horses, my niece and a desire to help others along in their journey using both my horses and my experience. My viewpoint now of resiliency is that God would not have brought me to it if He wasn’t going to bring me through it!
My "experience" isn’t the same as yours, but I’ve gathered knowledge from conversations, books, and patterns that shape how I understand and relate to the world. I have made some good decisions, but I have also made some colossal mistakes!
The challenges and successes you go through does not define you; it shapes you. I think a lot of times, people can get stuck in the idea that past struggles or labels (like “failure” or “victim”) are permanent, but they’re not. They’re parts of a bigger story, not the whole narrative. Every day is an opportunity to redefine yourself. Every setback or win teaches something new—whether it’s learning how to cope better, appreciating the highs more, or figuring out what you actually want out of life.
Another favorite saying of mine is that It will be alright in the end. If it not alright; is not the end! That does not mean I have rose colored glasses on. It means I have faith in myself but also in God, the Universe, a Higher Power or the Great Spirit - whatever you choose to call God. I may have to tell myself this once a day or a million times a day. I still have bad days but I always remember - it is not yet over - there is Hope!
At Hooves for Hope, my niece, Reghyn and I use our experience and the horses, to provide emotional and physical healing to people in need. We focus on helping individuals with disabilities, grief, trauma, mental health issues, and those facing life challenges, such as veterans or at-risk youth.
Remember, no matter who you are - where you are in life - what you have done - there is hope!
